I have made it to the end.... kind of. I've reached my due date anyway and that's a milestone in itself. I woke up this morning feeling upbeat and happy. Even if I didn't go into labour this week I knew I have a miracle growing in my belly and we are so close to meeting it. Like really close. Even if it is another 7 days before we meet him or her we are on the final leg of this seemingly massive journey. One that is basically a year in the making for us. It would be coming up to a year since we made the expedition back down to our IVF doctor to start the process again for another cycle of IVF. ( You can read about our journey to a family here) I remember feeling so hesitant and scared, really not wanting to embark on that well trodden path again. The drugs, feeling unwell, uncertanity and financial burden. Unfortunatley for us it's a path we have to take and one we are also thankful for. It has given us a family even if it is a hard road to travel. We were lucky to only have to undertake one cycle to conceive this baby and I am thankful for that.

 

This pregnancy was not without it's problems though. When I was 5-6 weeks pregnant I had a miscarriage scare which left me feeling unsure if this child would make it to the end. I distanced myself emotionally from this life growing within me. It was half way through the pregnancy before I could stop holding my breath as I was constantly waiting for something bad to happen. We are blessed beyond compare for me to be even standing in front of a window today holding my swollen belly. It all could of gone terribly wrong. My heart goes out to the women who have travelled the miscarriage road. I only had a small taste of it and it hurts.... bad.


 As my due date will probably come and go I am feeling positive and happy today to wait it out. (*Remind me of this 6 days from now when I'm over it will you*) J.D was 7 days overdue so I am preparing myself for the same thing with this little one. I had my 40 week O.B appointment today and his feeling towards waiting probably isn't the same as mine. You know how they are - get induced now so it fits in with them. He even made me get a CTG heart trace on the baby after our appointment to check everything was fine. This made me nervous as I didn't have to do anything like this with J.D. Everything was fine though and the midwife said this was now becoming a new procedure for him once expecting mum's hit their due date. I have an appointment booked a week from today to see him. I know if I make that appointment "induction" will be mentioned and most likely booked. So I am hoping I never make that appointment.


Tiredness and exhaustion are getting the better of me and I have been feeling a bit under the weather these past few days. Queensland has been experiencing a heatwave this week which has knocked me for a six. Sleeping is impossible and here I thought I would be missing the worst of the heat by having this baby in spring. I have been hibernating in front of the A/C for most of the week trying to conserve my energy. Trying to keep a 2 year old inside out of the heat is another story.

J.D is really starting to feel and probably notice the changes that are going on around him. He has been a little bit of a struggle these past few days as I talk more about the baby, pack and prepare for hospital and prepare the nursery. He has been mummy's boy for weeks now and these past few days have only intensified. I am starting to feel a little nervous at how he is going to react once we bring this baby home. I guess you can only take one day at a time with these things.

I couldn't help but share this picture below. He was being such a cutie as I trying to get these photo's taken (on a timer with a tripod by the way). {You can see my maternity photos for J.D here} Everytime I pressed the button and ran to the window he would laugh and giggle in sheer delight and follow me and pose like I was in front of the window. Hands on his "baby" belly looking at the camera. It was hilarious. I am trying to cherish these little moments alone that we have been having over the past few weeks.



 So I am hoping that this will be my last pregnancy post but here's to hoping! Wish me luck.

P.s. Don't forget to enter the BabyLove Nappy Pants giveaway happening over here.